Our society today has barely changed from what it has always been when it comes to popping the big question. Will you marry me? The question every woman waits for from her man, along with the diamond ring. But what about the men, do they wait for the day their girlfriends get down on one knee to propose to them?
How many of you laughed? Well, I did. Being a young woman who never fails to fight for the rights of women, I felt guilty realizing how hypocritical I am for having such a sexist view. Why is it that although we’ve come so far in equalizing women alongside men, we still haven’t been able to address such an issue that is very common amongst couples?
Who’s to blame for this ideology of men being the one to take action when it comes to his devotion to his woman? We’re so quick to point fingers to the media for influencing our society, but what about us? If more women began proposing to men, it would create a domino effect, eventually creating a norm in our society. Perhaps this is one tradition that may never change.
The psychological element of women wanting to be proposed to prevents the proposing norm from ending. A recent study by the University of California asked heterosexual students the very same question as I did in the poll, and not one of them said yes to the idea of having a woman propose to a man.
I’d like all of you to participate in this poll. Even if you aren’t going to comment, please vote so that we can see what the majority of our class thinks:
Questions to keep in mind:
-Do you think that women who propose to their boyfriend’s are desperate, or very confident in themselves?
-How do you feel about society targeting men when it comes to the ideology of marriage proposals?
I truly believe that women who propose to their boyfriend's aren't desperate, but they are very brave in doing so. It's very uncommon for a female to propose to her boyfriend because this action isn't a norm in society. I personally wouldn't do it because it isn't apart of my culture. We were brought up by the understanding that men should always ask a girl for her hand in marriage, not the other way around. I'm pretty sure this tradition is also apart of many other cultures around the world. I think that society necessarily doesn't target men in the issue of marriage proposals. By now they should be used to it. The action of men proposing to their girlfriends has been followed for many years, so men shouldn't take it as society trying to target them.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree with you more. But don't you find it very hypocritical that we are so quick to say that because of cultural traditions, this is how it should be? Couldn't we say the same thing about how women never worked and were housewives? Why was this once tradition okay to change?
DeleteI don't think women are desperate if they propose to their boyfriends. If two people love each other, why not get married? Regardless on who asks first. I think women who do this are really brave, and they're able to take the pressure off of the men when it comes to marriage proposals.
ReplyDeleteWould you say yes if a woman asked you to marry her? As a man, what would your worries be if any due to the fact that she couldn't wait for you to ask her? I agree with you when you say that either way it shouldn't matter who proposes to who if in the end they're getting married anyways. How do you feel about being put in the spotlight of pressure to propose to a woman when you're ready to do so?
DeleteI don’t think that girls who propose to their boyfriend’s are desperate because if a guy can do it, then why can’t a woman. I personally think that they are very confident if they do so. I don’t think that I would do it because I don’t have that kind of confidence.
ReplyDeleteAlthough it isn’t in a culture to do this, I think that it is unfair for society to think that only a man can propose to woman, and not the other way around. At the end of the day, they are going to get married, and it doesn’t matter who actually initiates the marital relationship.
It is unfair for society to be ignorant in this manner, I agree with you. You said that you wouldn't be able to propose to a man because you wouldn't be confident to do so. But what it you were outgoing in that manner, would you be too embarrassed or ashamed due to the judgement of those around you in our society?
DeleteI don’t think that a girl who proposes to her boyfriend is desperate. Just because the girl proposes doesn’t men anything other that the fact that shes unique and bold and the only reason why this ideology even exists is because it is not the norm. Throughout history men have always been the ones to propose, so for the women to propose shocks and confuses some people. I think that society encourages men to be the one to propose because they expect the man to be the dominant one in the relationship. Because of cultural and tradition beliefs are one of the main reasons as to why some people are stunned by the idea of a girl proposing to a guy.
ReplyDeleteExactly. But why do you think that every norm we've had in the past concerning women has changed today except this one? I find it very unjust that women want to be considered equal to men but if this tradition was modernized for women to propose, it would be looked down upon.
DeleteI don't think proposing to your boyfriend makes the girl desperate or even over confident. Just how the guys usually think the time is right to get married, the girl probably feels the same therefore takes a step forward. I don't like how society is looking down upon women who are proposing because there's nothing negative about it so why make it a big deal? We're past the traditional thinking where the man would get down on the knees to propose and I think it's a good thing of course we're able to express ourselves more. I think guys might feel inferior and emasculated to their partner due to this because their friends might make fun of them. A man shouldn't feel threatened by his girl's strong personality but be glad instead that she is a strong, independent woman.
ReplyDeleteIt's true. The stigma towards women is very strong. And what about lesbians? Obviously a women proposes, but we don't see that in a negative way because they're both women. It's funny how we are all quick to judge each other depending on a certain situation.
ReplyDeleteI don't think if the girl proposes to the guy means that she is desperate or overly confident in her self, I mean we are trying to make things equal among men and women, and that may take a while because of how society has put it, and this is one of things that most girls expect guys to do...or wait for. For me personally, I would want vee to propose to me because if i were to purpose, my family would talk...in my culture, the man is still considered the dominant one in the relationship.Although, some restrictions on girls are decreasing...Moreover,i think if were to hear more about girls proposing to the guy this could become a norm. what about you? what your personal opinion?
ReplyDelete